by Moyinoluwa Daniel

One of the topics we were taught to avoid, a subject that is constantly being stigmatised, silenced, shamed and treated like something that is not worth being mentioned or even talked about openly.

Hello everyone, my name is Danny, and I am the Technical Assistant (Communications and Advocacy) at YNCSD. I am honestly just writing this to vent about the dangers of abortion stigma and how it is continuously putting women’s lives at risk, and the enabling factor of this stigma, which is silence.

The reality is simple: abortion happens every day. And every day, women are trying to find safe ways to navigate it, often with very little help and support.

I’ve heard too many stories that start the same way. A woman gets pregnant when she’s not ready. Sometimes she’s young, sometimes she already has children, sometimes the pregnancy comes from violence, sometimes it’s just life being complicated. What they have in common is this: they don’t know safe spaces to turn to for help.

So, they search quietly, most times afraid to ask for help from friends and family. They ask strangers, hoping not to fall into the wrong hands, and unfortunately, many of them do.

A while back, I heard about a 19-year-old girl who tried to do the “right thing.” She went to a health facility looking for guidance. She was scared, but she did not know what to do again at that point. Instead of help, she was judged and criticised. Nurses called her an  “ashawo.” No information, no care or guidance, just stigma.

If she hadn’t later come across the right information, she could have easily ended up in an unsafe situation, not because she did not seek safe care, but because stigma has replaced care, and this is what abortion stigma looks like in real life.

Stigma is women being too afraid to ask questions. It’s the health facilities that judge instead of providing care.  It’s silence where there should be support and care. 

When women can’t find safe, reliable care, they become vulnerable, and they fall into the wrong hands. They use unsafe methods, they get infections, they experience trauma that stays with them long after the moment has passed, and in the worst case,s they lose their lives.

Not because abortion happened, but because safety and informed care were denied. 

Shame doesn’t stop abortion; it only makes it dangerous. 

What hurts the most is that many of these outcomes are preventable, with honest conversations, access to correct information and with healthcare systems that treat women with dignity and care. 

Breaking abortion stigma is about recognising that women are already making hard decisions and ensuring that they don’t have to risk their lives in the process.

I believe feminism must be grounded in truth. A movement that claims to care about women cannot remain silent while stigma pushes them into harm. Silence is not neutral; it is dangerous.

Women deserve better than care that is crippled by shame. They deserve accurate information. They deserve safety. They deserve care. 

Until we are willing to talk honestly about abortion, women will continue to pay the price for our silence.